5 Good Uses For That Unwanted Fruitcake That You Always Seem To Get Each Year

Yes, it is that time of year when festivities and gift giving seem to abound on every hand. Some gifts we enjoy, and others, well, you know, we don't.

You've probably asked yourself a thousand times, either out loud or in your head, "What am I to do with this fruitcake?" You know that dry, festive loaf with the little bits of "fruit" in them? Or the loaf that everyone seems to try and get rid of but nobody really wants?

You can avoid the disappointment of the rejected fruitcake and you no longer need to worry about what to do with it. Here are five uses for that unwanted loaf that you seem to get every year.

1. Bombs Away - If we gathered up all of the fruitcake across America, we would probably have enough to bomb the tar out any ISIS hide out. How thankful would our fighter pilots be to, not only help you get rid of the loaf, but also help our country in destroying our enemies?
2. DIY Cat Scratch Post - That's right! If you are a bit handy with tools or tired of your nasty, little tabby causing destructive scratching to your couch or curtains, here is the solution for you. Simply take the old fruitcake loaf and mount it to a 4X4 pole with a wide base and let her go at it! Two problems solved here.
3. Foot Prop - I'm sure some of you ladies have known people in the office, whose husbands made them a foot prop to rest their feet. You can save your hubby time and materials by using Glenda's "gift" of fruitcake as a foot prop. You may want to wrap it in paper so as to not offend her when she comes by your cubicle to show you her thick photo album of her grand kids. On company time, none-the-less.
4. A Loofah - All you have to do here is tie a small rope around one end of it and "wallah", you have a loofah to help you remove all of your dry skin when in the shower. Just make sure the little fruit chunks don't go down the drain.
5. Chock Block - This will be useful, especially if you park your car on a steep hill. Simply get a five gallon bucket and fill it with shellac resin and dip the fruitcake in it. Let it cure and then dip it again. Once the shellac is fully cured on the fruitcake, you can use it as a chock block behind the rear tire on the drivers side. This way, if the parking break stresses out, you'll have a good back-up plan. Safety first!