When the temperatures drop far below zero, you finally have excuses to avoid pretty much anything you want to avoid. You just need to plug in the right one. Here are a few to help you out.

We will start with some obvious ones then move up.

1). My car won't start.

2). The pipes froze in my house.

3). My pipes froze, it's embarrassing to talk about. I'll need to see my doctor.

4). My dog went out to pee and now he's frozen to the tree.

5). I tried going outside but the air punched me in the face.

6). The authorities said don't stay outside any longer than 10 minutes. I refuse to risk it.

7). It took me all night to get this bed warm. I'm not sure I can do that again.

8). My coat is only rated for -1f.

9). If the mailman won't even go out in this why should I?

10). Are you CRAZY?